Home on time, greeted at the door
So vibrant, completely full of life
Such pure joy in a world full of strife
Young and so full of innocence
Could even bring smiles to the poor
Life bundled small yet immense
A knock at the door, fall back asleep
Again shortly after, this one answered
Bearer of a message not preferred
Arriving to the sight, a sad scene
Sadness, but no one thinks to weep
Goodbye my friend, now so serene
peace out pal, I will definitely miss you.
Plans begun, intentions intact
Well thought through, or so thought
Lessons of the past are consulted
Obviously there was more to have been learned
Original plans change out of necessity
Unintentional and certainly unplanned
But what is done is done
Could this have been better?
Could I have thought this out more?
What worthless questions
Certain questions evaluate the past
Prompting lessons for the future
Others simply waste time
Instilling doubt in our minds
Better questions are available
What could I do better in the future?
How can I turn this for something good?
How can I grow personally from this?
And the list could go on and on
Questions that hold knowledge of the past
And use that knowledge to improve the future
Here is another question then
How do you open a locked door?
There's a key, but it's well hidden
Kick it open wide? Is it fragile?
Pick it slowly with skill and time?
Or with some knowledge or luck
There still is a key to be found
The sun is brighter now
The sky is bluer without you
Now fully free to pursue
The wondering questions I allow
Failed attempts to renew
Finding myself now at peace
Hopes for you I release
So many conversations untrue
New lands are up for lease
Unexplored paths to follow
At times hard to swallow
All my hopes steadily increase
In light of the former post... this is the last thing I wrote in my notebook.
_________________________
The sun retires as the familiar darkness returns
Twinkle, twinkle little star, one again, there you are
So distance, barely seeping through the vibrant darkness
The clouds come and you disappear completely
Only childhood memories and songs reminds me of you
Long departed, the eyes drift down, gazing at things closer
Blow the clouds away and peep through
Give my eyes another chance to glance at you
Oh won't you shake the darkness' grasp
And fall down to me where we can reunite
I opened up this post to write about a strong split I have been feeling lately, but as I went to write the title, another thought came to mind. Just a few weeks ago, a friend of mine was at the house and saw some of my older paintings. He proceeded to describe me as dark. I cannot say I was shocked at the accusation, but I was not entirely sure how to respond to his analysis. It made me look at all the paintings I had done and think about their meanings. Some where thought out during or before the creation process while others were completely random, but well over half (possibly more as I don't know where some are...) were a strong darkness pushing against lighter colors.
Which leads me into the original reason for my writing. For the first time in a while, I have felt unbridled optimism about things in my future and a lot of person changes have taken place just over the last few weeks - some good, some bad. However, I have also encountered some strong spouts of lethargy. This is nothing unfamiliar in my own life or in humanity in general, but it is still frustrating. On that note, I should probably get back to writing my paper...
